The worst reason EVER to miss a Texas game

[GhostOfTomJoad]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.

Why?

Because my wife spent weeks getting us tickets to see Twilight: New Moon at the Drafthouse @ 7PM on Saturday.

Kill me.

[crackamacgowski]

You should have kept this to yourself.

[mdmost]

Divorce then nuke site from orbit. Only way to be sure.

Seriously, why even post this? You're about to get your ass handed to you by this board. Wasn't your wife handing you your ass enough?

[qB1012]

Oh hell no. I'm not married, but I would not allow. There are 6 other days in the week and months and years to see it. This is Colt and the Seniors last home game. Come on man!

[TexArcher]

http://aroundthesphere.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/divorce-poster.jpg

[mrsmacgowski]

That is terrible. Awful. Horrendous.

[thekube]

Seeing Twilight is bad enough by itself.

[HenryGandorf]

i hate to be captain obvious, but it's a chick movie, wouldn't she have fun with the girls? does she have friends? can i send her some?

this thing is a dealbreaker. please turn in your longhorn card, and may god have mercy on your soul.

oh, and how do you spend weeks getting a movie ticket? i'm sure she purchased weeks ago, but it's not like it took more than 5 minutes of effort and timing. that theater is gonna be all chicks and gay doods.

[KC-97HORN]

you sir are a dumbass- not only because you would allow your wife to buy tickets on a home game saturday night, but because you would be dumb enough to come on this board and tell us you basically have no balls anymore.

christ man- do it friday night or sunday night or hell- sunday afternoon

[skyharbor215]

Ouch. Will she divorce you if you bail? Doubtful. May be pissed off for awhile, but worth it? Definitely. Very definitely.

[Red Riverer]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.
Me neither. Instead, I get to drive up to Waco to see a play that a family member is appearing in. What a joyous day this will be. :whiteflag:

[WeAreTX]

You have got to be fucking kidding me...

Grow some nuts.

[Jive Turkey]

dude, get rid of the avatar. the Boss would not approve.

replace with a pair of balls, since you obviously dont' have any.

[UTEX90]

There is not a married woman alive that is nasty enough to make this worth it, I don't care what she promised you.

[Stringer]

Have her call a friend. Either that or get a fake doctor's note that says you have the swine flu.

[kangsta]

mother of god

[kangsta]

i have a wedding at 7 to go to and thought that was bad

[BigOrange]

Me neither. Instead, I get to drive up to Waco to see a play that a family member is appearing in. What a joyous day this will be. :whiteflag:

this is where generally being an asshole can work in your favor. i dont get invited to bullshit like that.

as to the op, its a fucking movie. its not like the tickets cost an arm and a leg and there won't be a thousand other chances to see it. blow that shit off.

[hitbyatrain]

Grow some balls, and tell her you're not going to be able to go, and that she can take one of her fat little friends. Jesus, man. If she cant understand that you don't want to see that stupid fucking movie, she's a stupid bitch and needs to be taught a lesson.

[HenryGandorf]

BO - exactly. a wedding would suck, but at least it's understandable.

[victory88]

it's a fucking movie you can watch any other night. Dump your wife/gf if she can't understand that.

[The Tower]

tell her not just no, but hell no

[slorch]

My wife is my best friend. In being so, she understands that without one iota of doubt there is no fucking way I would miss a big night for my team when the theater is open 6 other nights that week...

[HenryGandorf]

here's my question - how is she acting about this?

if she feels bad, and is overly apologetic, then it seems like something you should be able to get out of. if she's snotty about it, and puts a movie ahead of shit you're interested in, shit that you can only legitimately do 5-6 times a year, then what the fuck are you doing with this person?

[McNelly]

You must be shitting us..this is a joke, right?

[misterloki]

This is what you get for marrying a 13 year old.

[Quasimofo]

What a sweet, sensitive husband! Strait Horn needs to take you off of the nerd list. (on the bright side, maybe you can line up some stray)

[ECHorn]

.

this is pitiful.

the good news is, after you divorce this wife, you will know not to get married anymore. So you can do what you want to, when you want to. That's what I did.

And my girlfriend understands that sports come first. True.


.

[Sii]

if your wife expects you to go and doesnt understand what is happening Sat night you married the wrong woman pure and simple

even the ex bitch wife I was married to for almost 8 years would have never pulled this shit

[Jive Turkey]

going to a Jonas Brothers concert on Saturday night would be less embarrassing.

[slorch]

BO - exactly. a wedding would suck, but at least it's understandable.

no it's not.

My family knows- no fucking weddings during football season. That's why June is on the calendar...

[mdmost]

My wife is my best friend. In being so, she understands that without one iota of doubt there is no fucking way I would miss a big night for my team when the theater is open 6 other nights that week...

Hear fucking hear. Just told my wife about this and she laughed. No way in hell would she miss Colt's Senior Day.

[orangeuahorn2]

Don't do it.

It's easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission.

And you shouldn't have to ask for permission anyway...*snicker*...but maybe YOU do.

















homo

























:D

[TexArcher]

i have a wedding at 7 to go to and thought that was bad

Wedding is understandable and unavoidable. I wish more people would have the common courtesy to not get married on Saturdays in the fall, but if they decide to be selfish pricks there's not much you can do.

A movie, on the other hand, is a horrible reason to miss a Texas game.

That movie is a horrible reason to miss a root canal.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

More details, not that it will matter one bit: I turn 40 on Thanksgiving. We head out next Tuesday to spend the week in Vegas at the Venetian. She's never been to Vegas before. My ex & I used to go all the time, so she feels so doubt (typical chick bullshit). It's a big deal. Her attitude about this Saturday (although she's also a Texas Ex & huge 'horn fan; even named our 2nd cat Major) is "it's fucking Kansas, we'll beat them by 40 points" so therefore it's more important that I show her how much I respect things she's passionate about & sacrifice a little for her.

Yes, she's smoking hot. She's blonde, did her undergrad @ Baylor, & has a twin sister. She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

My plan is to get plastered & the Alamo Sat. night, go out to the lobby 1/2 way through & see if they're showing the game.

I'm fucked, guys. I share this with you not for sympathy, but to accept the fact that in the end every man--no matter how big--is controlled by the pussy. This is my moment of shame.

[crackamacgowski]

More details, not that it will matter one bit: I turn 40 on Thanksgiving. We head out next Tuesday to spend the week in Vegas at the Venetian. She's never been to Vegas before. My ex & I used to go all the time, so she feels so doubt (typical chick bullshit). It's a big deal. Her attitude about this Saturday (although she's also a Texas Ex & huge 'horn fan; even named our 2nd cat Major) is "it's fucking Kansas, we'll beat them by 40 points" so therefore it's more important that I show her how much I respect things she's passionate about & sacrifice a little for her.

Yes, she's smoking hot. She's blonde, did her undergrad @ Baylor, & has a twin sister. She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

My plan is to get plastered & the Alamo Sat. night, go out to the lobby 1/2 way through & see if they're showing the game.

I'm fucked, guys. I share this with you not for sympathy, but to accept the fact that in the end every man--no matter how big--is controlled by the pussy. This is my moment of shame.

Two things:

1. Cunt punt.
2. Can I have your tickets?

[slorch]

That'll cost her all day Saturday with me lounging in the sportsbook...at a minimum. NBAA

No Bitching At All!

[HookEmTX]

Semi serious question here: Does your wife not know how important Texas football is to you? I mean, that seems like it would be something pretty important for you two to share.

[celis]

You better hate fuck this chick Saturday night.

[ECHorn]

She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

if you REALLY get access to all holes on a really hot chick, that reduces the shame.

good luck with that....she might get a headache...


:twisted:

[Quasimofo]

More details, not that it will matter one bit: I turn 40 on Thanksgiving. We head out next Tuesday to spend the week in Vegas at the Venetian. She's never been to Vegas before. My ex & I used to go all the time, so she feels so doubt (typical chick bullshit). It's a big deal. Her attitude about this Saturday (although she's also a Texas Ex & huge 'horn fan; even named our 2nd cat Major) is "it's fucking Kansas, we'll beat them by 40 points" so therefore it's more important that I show her how much I respect things she's passionate about & sacrifice a little for her.

Yes, she's smoking hot. She's blonde, did her undergrad @ Baylor, & has a twin sister. She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

My plan is to get plastered & the Alamo Sat. night, go out to the lobby 1/2 way through & see if they're showing the game.

I'm fucked, guys. I share this with you not for sympathy, but to accept the fact that in the end every man--no matter how big--is controlled by the pussy. This is my moment of shame.

My solution to this entire ordeal, would be to post nude pics of her in NSAA. That would make me feel better, get my Man Card back, and it's win-win for Shagsters. That's what a man would do. But, then again, you're not a man until Thanksgiving apparently. :mrgreen:

[HenryGandorf]

you had me at 40.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

Semi serious question here: Does your wife not know how important Texas football is to you? I mean, that seems like it would be something pretty important for you two to share.

She absolutely knows. And she's almost as committed as I am. We plan our weekends around the games, either going to them, tailgating, or watching them on TV.

She actually admitted to feeling bad about getting the movie tix (she thought the game was @ 2:30, not 7:00).

I've chosen to approach it this way: I now have carte blanche to gamble & drink as much as I want next week.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

you had me at 40.

Ouch. That fucking hurts.

[slorch]

man whore...If you're not loyal to Colt, who will you be loyal to?

[EddieMoney]

Ghost,

You are missing most people's point... you can go to the movie ANY night.

This isn't about sex and being whipped, its about respect. It seems like she doesn't respect you that much, relatively speaking.

[Continental Op]

Have you tried hitting her?

[crackamacgowski]

Ghost,

You are missing most people's point... you can go to the movie ANY night.

This isn't about sex and being whipped, its about respect. It seems like she doesn't respect you that much, relatively speaking.

I still don't understand the "spent weeks getting tickets" thing.

[EddieMoney]

She actually admitted to feeling bad about getting the movie tix (she thought the game was @ 2:30, not 7:00).


Are you worried about the $24 you are going to lose having to throw away the movie tickets and get some for a decent time?

[GPLonghorn5]

what he said

[Scraps]

Change your user name to GhostofTomChoad

[UTEX90]

This should be in the "That's just wrong" thread.

[EddieMoney]

Have you tried hitting her?

Or shaking, try shaking the shit out of her

[Bobby Light]

dude, you are pitiful.

and you say she's a huge horn fan but she still won't accept that you can go see the movie at 5 different times a day for the next two months

i don't feel sorry for you, oh wait, yes, yes i do feel sorry for you

[IPoopOnWhoop]

the only pussy you are controlled by is your own

[slorch]

because the other 351 nights that UT doesn't play just wouldn't work...

[smax]

I would go to alamo's site buy some tickets to an early afternoon show NOW

[Hellraiser97]

I feel too bad for the original poster's utter and complete loss of manhood to make fun of him. Seriously, NO one should ever be this emasculated.

[McNelly]

Wait a second..you are turning 40, this is your second wife, and you're going to a teeny bopper movie on a Saturday night instead of the Horns last home game during an undefeated season...geesh.
Do you and your wife also live with your/her parents?

[Hellraiser97]

He may be forty, but he's no man.

[McNelly]

Change your user name to GhostofTomChoad
No shit.

[Quasimofo]

I feel too bad for the original poster's utter and complete loss of manhood to make fun of him. Seriously, NO one should ever be this emasculated.

Eddie Money, you may be brokering the wrong tickets!

[GoingCoastal]

She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.


Did you tell her this season's theme is NLAA?

[creasy]

Paging blacklab... please change GOTJ from "asshat" to "Team Edward" or "Team Jacob"--you know, depending on if his wife likes the vampire or the werewolf.

[slorch]

Unless she's the blonde chick on V, it ain't worth it...

[HornsN04]

http://raoworld.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/facepalm_implied.jpg

[Hellraiser97]

Yes, she's smoking hot. She's blonde, did her undergrad @ Baylor, & has a twin sister. She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

Your one hope for redemption is to donkey punch her.

[Gehrig]

you had me at 40.

Fuck that. I turn 40 next year. My wife KNOWS that Saturdays are for football. I don't leave the house, I don't cook, I don't clean and I barely make sure the yard apes don't kill each other. Texas is on and I'm in front of a TV.

And you guys think my wife carries my balls around in her purse.

[Gehrig]

Wait a second..you are turning 40, this is your second wife, and you're going to a teeny bopper movie on a Saturday night instead of the Horns last home game during an undefeated season...geesh.
Do you and your wife also live with your/her parents?

No shit. Act like a man.

[Quasimofo]

She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.

Is she talking about her "doors" or yours?

[Hellraiser97]

Is she talking about her "doors" or yours?

Good point. Odds are he takes the strap-on too.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

I still don't understand the "spent weeks getting tickets" thing.

Apparently the thing's been pre-sold for weeks to thousands of teenage girls. I told her the only way I was going to see it was @ the Alamo so I could at least drink throughout the fucking thing. They were sold out, but opened up new seats earlier this week. She was able to get some the other day.

Yeah, I'm a pussy. But would a pussy really share something this humiliating w/ the shag if deep down he wasn't a man?

[Scooter]

you're kinda a puss.

Edit: I told my wife about this. She thinks your a puss too.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

Is she talking about her "doors" or yours?

Fuck. I'd better get clarification on that detail.

[kushphog]

She absolutely knows. And she's almost as committed as I am. We plan our weekends around the games, either going to them, tailgating, or watching them on TV.

She actually admitted to feeling bad about getting the movie tix (she thought the game was @ 2:30, not 7:00).

I've chosen to approach it this way: I now have carte blanche to gamble & drink as much as I want next week.


last home game of the year, senior day(night), historic record for colt v a movie designed for 13 yr old girls but gosh gee you can drink all the Malibu with orange juice you can get a hold of and she lets you have the c/c next week.

[Bob Lives!]

you suck as a person.

[Sac]

Saturday is the only night that movie is playing, then, they're burning all copies. You made a good deci...oh, wait....

Others that share your decision making skills...

http://z.about.com/d/crime/1/0/w/6/buttafuoco.jpg

http://zoice.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/tonya-harding.jpg

http://www.rmichelson.com/Artist_Pages/MGnatek/Custer.jpg

[mdmost]

I still don't understand the "spent weeks getting tickets" thing.

Apparently the thing's been pre-sold for weeks to thousands of teenage girls. I told her the only way I was going to see it was @ the Alamo so I could at least drink throughout the fucking thing. They were sold out, but opened up new seats earlier this week. She was able to get some the other day.

Yeah, I'm a pussy. But would a pussy really share something this humiliating w/ the shag if deep down he wasn't a man?Correct me if I'm wrong but there are 3 other Alamo location in Austin, no? All of them have simultaneously sold out for weeks? And even if they have, it's a fucking movie. It will be out for a while. It's really that important to her to see a shitty vampire/werewolves movie with you in attendance? My wife wants to see tons of shitty chick movies but I'm not forced to go to any of them. She has chick friends for that. Why would you agree to this? I just don't get it. You realize this is the last chance you'll have to see Kindle, Shipley, and Colt playing a game at home, right?

[mdmost]

Oh and make sure to order a bitch drink when you go. Wow, just... wow.

[fetoid]

to the OP......damn. your balls.....so sorry about them, they have obviously had better days....and must have been worth pride at some point in your life....my condolences

[Scooter]

Blacklab should change you from "asshat" to "eunuch"

[GhostOfTomJoad]

The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"

It's all coming together.

[Gehrig]

http://recruiter.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/fail.jpg

[SniveliusMaximus]

did her undergrad @ Baylor


she's punishing you for last week. like you didn't see this one coming? take her to a sunday movie.

[C-Man]

Well, this thread title certainly delivered.

[Sac]

The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"

It's all coming together.

You obviously haven't been married long...there are blackout dates on those "cash ins"

[mdmost]

Wow, way to fall on that grenade so you'll earn the Purple Heart. Enjoy watching Edward brood while the rest of us are enjoying Colt breaking the record.

[kushphog]

http://stagevu.com/

http://veehd.com/

http://freefullmovies.net/

http://www.watch-movies-online.tv/

the movie will be on one of the sites by the time you get home from the football game. you really need to upload pics youve taken from the game.

[The Tower]

why don't you sell those movie tickets and make a shit load more of money?

[StregaHorn]

No sex is worth missing Colt's last game for a fucking teeny bopper Vampire movie.

You, sir, have no balls.

And Creasy's selection for Team Jacob or Team Edward is brilliant.

[slorch]

You obviously haven't been married long...

that's what I was thinking.
The wife is never there to negotiate. She's there to take it all.

[WoLF2001]

http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b72/cmore675/Fail/1210282436804.jpg

[KC-97HORN]

who the FUCK cares that the movie is sold out- you are missing the point everyone has told you. This movie will play all week, and the next week, and hell, you may even be able to watch the fucking thing in Vegas.


Getting pooper action does NOT diminish the stupidness of this post. Nevermind that its your second time at the rodeo. Tell her to take a friend and you will do the same- at the fucking game. I dont care how bad she feels.

*AND* if this movie is as sold out as you claim- then fucking sell the tickets at a profit.

but I cant understand why the fuck teenage girls would want to watch the movie at the drafthouse in the first place- they cant take advantage of the drafthouse, and instead will pay more for the honor of watching the movie at the drafthouse?

BULLSHIT

you are getting played, and you are going to miss senior day just so you can fuck your wife in the ass one time and get your bi-yearly blowjob allowance.

send your man card to Mr Mom there in Seattle- at least that fucker has the excuse that he tricked his wife into being the moneymaker.

[Bob Lives!]

thank G-d I didn't marry a woman who makes me surrender my manhood in exchange for a little nooky. pitiful.

[kushphog]

practice first (http://www.hitthebitch.dk/)

[wild_turkey]

Sounds like you don't have a chance of getting out of the movie. With that in mind, I suggest you do everything possible to acquire tickets to a showing on Friday night. (assuming it opens Friday like every other movie) That seems like a possible way out because you would be surprising her by going a day earlier, on opening night no less, and then there would be no point in doing a repeat on Saturday. Have her sell her tickets to a friend or something. And take her out to a nice dinner somewhere beforehand. Make the whole thing a date and be proactive in planning it, then she wins on Friday and you both win on Saturday.


Man I have a wedding to go to on Saturday evening that I was really depressed about. This cheered me up...slightly. No wait I'm still pissed, just not as pissed as you I guess.

[txgirl123]

Twilight sucks.

[VinceYoungScores]

so your wife is a sooner?

[BigOrange]

She absolutely knows. And she's almost as committed as I am. We plan our weekends around the games, either going to them, tailgating, or watching them on TV.

She actually admitted to feeling bad about getting the movie tix (she thought the game was @ 2:30, not 7:00).

I've chosen to approach it this way: I now have carte blanche to gamble & drink as much as I want next week.

i am so never getting married.

[IPoopOnWhoop]

after thinking about it, i have changed my opinion and will now trade my game ticket for a twilight ticket. any takers?

[longhornbambam]

http://sleevage.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/lord_of_acid_pussy.jpg

http://blog.nj.com/entertainment_impact_celebrities/2007/08/large_pastore.jpg

http://img5.travelblog.org/Photos/75305/349960/f/3343030-Super-Pussy-Club-in-Bangkok-0.jpg

[bigup2dahorns]

if this is married life, i am never getting married

[smax]

Correct me if I'm wrong but there are 3 other Alamo location in Austin, no? All of them have simultaneously sold out for weeks? And even if they have, it's a fucking movie. It will be out for a while. It's really that important to her to see a shitty vampire/werewolves movie with you in attendance? My wife wants to see tons of shitty chick movies but I'm not forced to go to any of them. She has chick friends for that. Why would you agree to this? I just don't get it. You realize this is the last chance you'll have to see Kindle, Shipley, and Colt playing a game at home, right?


That is why I said go to an earlier showing, I just looked at their website and the one on South Lamar still has tickets to the 12:25 and 3:35 show.

The op is fucking retarded

[StregaHorn]

if this is married life, i am never getting married

[GPLonghorn5]

Fuck that. I turn 40 next year. My wife KNOWS that Saturdays are for football. I don't leave the house, I don't cook, I don't clean and I barely make sure the yard apes don't kill each other. Texas is on and I'm in front of a TV.

And you guys think my wife carries my balls around in her purse.

:hookem:

[tx 3 putt]

mez approves of the OP


that's all I'm saying

[Huckleberry]

This is not married life. This is the OP's life.

I can't say anything that hasn't been said, other than you should be ashamed of being a pedophile. She must be 13 if fucking Twilight means this much to her. The fact you married someone with teenage tastes is almost as embarrassing as the fact you're missing the game to see a vampire movie. Well, okay, not even close. But it's pretty embarrassing.

Oh yeah, my wife is steam cleaning the carpets in our house right now while I post on shaggy and watch a fucking MAC football game on ESPN2 and the Longhorn basketball team play Western Carolina on ESPNU.

You suck at life.

[geez]

1. take a big shit
2. wipe with best, monogrammed towel, mangino style
3. leave towel on bathroom floor
4. wife kicks you out
5. ???
6. profit

sometimes you need to take extra steps and explain every detail, especially for a pussy like you

[utexas_61]

I might not make the game, but that is because I am going to be working 18 hour days for the next few weeks, just bought a new house, and have tons of shit I need to get done this weekend, and won't have next weekend because of aggy and holidays.

I also don't live in Austin.

[Sac]

I might not make the game, but that is because I am going to be working 18 hour days for the next few weeks, just bought a new house, and have tons of shit I need to get done this weekend, and won't have next weekend because of aggy and holidays.

I also don't live in Austin.

Edward and Jacob think you're weak.

[crackamacgowski]

Everytime I think this is because of Twilight I become more and more enraged.

[texasdago]

I won't make the game because we're having a baby on Friday morning... and that's a sketchy excuse but yours... oh man. Are you going to wear a skirt to the movie?

[Prairie Style]

If your wife actually loved you she would have bought you two tickets to the midnight screening on Friday.

[Mizzou415]

Seriously. Just go see the fucking movie in Vegas. There's a theatre at The Palms.

[Red Five]

I didn't read this whole thread, so if you're joking or something, I apologize.

But your wife must fucking hate you or something. It's a movie. They play at various times of every day. Didn't see it Saturday? No problem, it's playing hundreds of times THE VERY NEXT FUCKING DAY all over Austin. That's what's great about movies; you can watch them whenever the fuck you want.

But again, I didn't read the thread, so maybe you were just kidding.

[HornsN04]

Everytime I think this is because of Twilight I become more and more enraged.

[crackamacgowski]

I didn't read this whole thread, so if you're joking or something, I apologize.

But your wife must fucking hate you or something. It's a movie. They play at various times of every day. Didn't see it Saturday? No problem, it's playing hundreds of times THE VERY NEXT FUCKING DAY all over Austin. That's what's great about movies; you can watch them whenever the fuck you want.

But again, I didn't read the thread, so maybe you were just kidding.

He isn't.

[Huckleberry]

I have to admit, though, this may be the first time I've seen a thread with "EVER" in the title that was accurate.

[UTEX90]

I have to admit, though, this may be the first time I've seen a thread with "EVER" in the title that was accurate.

[74BurntOrangeFordMaverick]

I just paid my wife $200 to clear Nuttcracker Ballet off calendar day of B12 Championship. Everyone is happy.

[Pimphand]

Hahahahahahahahahah I was going to post up not to feel bad because I too will be missing this week's game but at least I'm picking up a car in Charlotte and stopping at the UVa @ Clemson game on my way home.

[Rocko20]

Atleast we know who wears the pants in the OP's relationship.

Every man needs to lay down the rules before he gets hitched. NOTHING interferes with football season.

[Red Five]

WTF?

Should this anger me? I guess it does, because I'm used to women pulling fucking stupid shit like this to me and all of my friends. Tell her you'll see the shitty movie with her literally any other time.

Fucking Christ. And while you're at it, you might want to tell her that you'll be busy Thanksgiving night, as well as the night of January 7th.

[Used2b]

No good ever came from this thing they call "Twilight".

[rage-a-holic]

The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"

Dream the fuck on. She already gave you the response you're going to get whenever you attempt to use that against her. "Big fucking deal, it was Kansas, we beat them by 40 points."

[CPHornFan]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.

Why?

Because my wife spent weeks getting us tickets to see Twilight: New Moon at the Drafthouse @ 7PM on Saturday.

Kill me.

Twilght? Do you know how I know you're gay?

[Huckleberry]

Dream the fuck on. She already gave you the response you're going to get whenever you attempt to use that against her. "Big fucking deal, it was Kansas, we beat them by 40 points."

Wait until she uses this one:

"You can't try to use that against me now. It wasn't important enough at the time for you to skip a teeny-bopper vampire movie, so you can't pretend like it's important now."

The OP will have no logical counterargument.

[HornOnTheBayou]

Yes, she's smoking hot. She's blonde, did her undergrad @ Baylor, & has a twin sister. She's promised me "every door is open" while we're celebrating my birthday.


You need to find out if all the sister's doors are open too. This is the only thing that could make me possibly, maybe miss the game.


She absolutely knows. And she's almost as committed as I am.

I don't think you know what the word "committed" means.


The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"

It's all coming together.

You don't really understand women, do you? You didn't sacrifice anything because you wanted to go to the movie and you love your wife and wanted to spend quality time with her. That's how it will be remembered for "fucking years to come".


This is not married life. This is the OP's life.


So very much this.

[DAGMAR]

Usually, in threads like this, I feel sorry for the dogpile on the OP. Not this one. Twilight is shit and you suck

[mdleast]

http://www.haloknights.co.uk/fag.jpg

[utexas_61]

NOTHING interferes with football season.

Tell that to the Air Force

[crackamacgowski]

Wait until she uses this one:

"You can't try to use that against me now. It wasn't important enough at the time for you to skip a teeny-bopper vampire movie, so you can't pretend like it's important now."

The OP will have no logical counterargument.

I'm pretty sure that's why uxoricide exists.

[tejas60]

wouldn't she have fun with the girls? does she have friends? can i send her some?.

HG, please send said girlfriends to my wife.

thanks.

[jrj9384]

man the fuck up and don't go

[atllonghorn]

I will never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever date a chick who doesn't understand and respect the fact that outside of maybe Rice (or a team of that ilk) I will not miss a Texas game.

If that means I'm never getting married, so be it. Any chick worth it would let you watch the game in peace or watch it with you and maybe give you a bj at halftime.

[kangsta]

i still can't believe this is real. our worlds are so different

[Bevoette]

ummm I would have told her to take a friend LOL I'd rather be at the football game!!!!!!!!

[houstonhookem]

Mike Leech says tell her to take one of her fat little girlfriends

[froghorn717]

http://i305.photobucket.com/albums/nn216/froghorn717/cleveland.gif

[campwillben]

What the fuck? C'mon man. Nut up dude.

[WeAreTX]

the only pussy you are controlled by is your own

Fucking this. No matter how you try to spin this shit, I'm not buying it.

[Bodowned]

Tell her that you refuse to watch because of the underlying misogynistic themes.

(also because it's a steaming pile of mormon propoganda)

[GSU&UT]

As someone else suggested. If "all doors are open" then you should thrown in a donkey punch for good measure.

[Mr. Furley]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wZWnTG06eTc/SZ7W4lxzCeI/AAAAAAAADzs/DAd8Y-_RBv0/s400/gay-asian-men.jpg

[mez2]

mez approves of the OP


that's all I'm saying

hi


wait, wut? fuck that noise i would never see miss a horns game to see twilight.

[cabowabo]

I only read the initial post, and not any of the responses, but there is no fucking way this is a real post. No fucking way.

[mdleast]

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_wZWnTG06eTc/SZ7W4lxzCeI/AAAAAAAADzs/DAd8Y-_RBv0/s400/gay-asian-men.jpg

I like the way you think on this....Kudos to you good sir!

[USMChorn]

The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"

It's all coming together.
Right, you stood up for yourself so well this time, I really see you bringing this up and winning an argument down the road.

You have one seriously selfish bitch for a wife or whatever she is, and you are an absolutely giant gaping axe wound.

[Rocko20]

Tell that to the Air Force

:lol: The transformation from a boy to a man has to start somewhere.

[UTEngr]

are you fucking kidding me!!!.... I would miss my own wedding for this game....

whoa>.... Fuck... sorry man.... fuck all that shit.... that's what sunday's are for.

[LonghornSean]

No way this is real.


I mean, COME THE FUCK ON.

[achooloco]

someone said watch it in vegas and i agree. say its something that both of you can share and make it yours or some shit. especially since she thinks vegas is an ex thing, it might work. does vegas have an imax? are they showing it at that location? fuck, there are about a million different options that could kill two birds with one stone here if you take about 30 minutes on the internets to sort it out. quit being lazy and pussy whipped and man up.

[DCA_HORN]

GOTJ, congrats you have reached the Derka and Grendel ability to start a complete failure of a thread. :brckwall:

[KingKoopa]

sorry to pile on, but the movie will still be in theaters the following day, and the next, and the next...

sounds like a power play.

[MrPhlegm]

wooden stake motherfucker, USE IT!

[gs1]

ha this isnt real. i recall a thread like this at HF last year. you almost had me.

[UTfootballFan]

I am a woman. I can't imagine being the kind of woman who would do something like this. Good lord, no wonder you guys think women are ridiculously needy bitches. Who's raising these idiotic girls to be so, so, ... I think devious might be the right word. "If you really love me you'll go to this movie with me, even though you'll hate it." Bah! You guys need to start looking for the sensible, confident in herself, kind of woman, who won't play these stupid, stupid games.

[Horny04]

This...this is bad.

In defense of relationships/marriage to all of you haters:

I stupidly agreed to go to a social event with my Fiancee around 6ish this Saturday thinking the game was earlier.

After we had committed to it, I told her about my mistake, and her response was "Ok fine we'll leave early, you won't miss the game"

And she is going stag to her company Christmas party because I'll be in Dallas for the big 12 game.

And she chases ME around the house trying to get me naked. And she's hot.

Ok I feel better.

[TrashMaster G]

I'm sorry, but I gotta call bullshit.

[zzzz]

Not surprised she wants to see Twilight. Sounds like she has fangs.

[Gehrig]

wooden stake motherfucker, USE IT!

Yes. This. Do it, Van Helsing.

[TxArch]

http://oneeighthbritish.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/torbush-wow.gif

[honolulu horn]

My wife bought me two tickets to the Rose Bowl game against USC, and told me the second ticket was for my buddy and not for her. We both graduated from UT and went to plenty of games together, but she knew that I would have more fun with my buddy. That's a wife you want to keep around.

[runthebone]

What the fuck is Twilight? I can only tell by inference that it fucking sucks unless you are a certain type of girl or a guy who loves dicks. This "prove how much I mean to you" bullshit does not apply during the 3 hours a week Texas plays.

[Bernard]

If this is real, then the OP is the most retarded fucker I've ever read about since the time I read the story about the guy who married a chick that turned out to be a DUDE and didn't even figure it out until a couple years after the wedding.

The only thing worse than the original post is the justifications he keeps trying to come up with. Pathetic (but only because I don't know a word for pathetic x 1000). He thinks he's building up credits that he'll cash in later. FUCKING HILARIOUS. Truth is that she now knows with 100% certainty that she owns your ass. If you'll give up this, you'll give up anything. Your life is on an express train to Suckville and you don't even know it.

Bernard

[Jive Turkey]

real or not, it's entertaining.

and if it is real, the wife must have something huge hanging over TomChoad's head. he must have fucked up in the past, and this is his punishment.

[ATX_INTELLECT]

I was going to post a hilarious picture...but at this point it would just be piling on.

[hookemsaint88]

You better hate fuck this chick Saturday night.

haha.. i laughed

[slorch]

Mike Leech says tell her to take one of her fat little girlfriends

Mike Leach says, " Son, you gotta swing your sword! You have a sword don't you?"

Mike Gundy says, " You're gonna be 40, Be a Man!"

Mark Mangino says," I bet she'd taste better in butter..."

Stoops said, " Cheating ain't that bad. You'll get used to it."

Art Briles said, "When your main gun goes down(whether it's your backbone or RG III,) you'll never recover."

Mike Sherman says, "You might think you're an NFL level husband, but you need to ride the pine."

Bo Pelini says, " Holy ^**((&^%$ son!!!!( arms waving wildly with contorted face) What kind of play call is that?"

Dan Hawkins says, " I got a letter... Seems someone's gonna get their feelings hurt because you want to see the Texas game Saturday night? Well they have 8 months of the offseason, 6 days a week during the season , and now they're a little bummed out because you want to watch the UT game Saturday night... This is DIVISION I FOOTBALL! IT'S THE BIG XII!. It's MARRIAGE! If you want to go see Twilight, Go date someone in junior high, brother."

Mack Brown put an asterisk on your marriage.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

I've gotta say it's quite an experience to take the brunt of a full on Shag attack. I mean I've read 'em, contributed to 'em, and laughed at 'em for years, but when the barrel is pointed directly at you it's something else. I think 'GhostOfTomChoad' was my favorite bit.

[mdmost]

You still need some sort of punishment for even bringing this nonsense to the Shag. I mean really, missing Senior Day for a movie? Why would you even allow that thought to enter her head?

[slorch]

Peer pressure...it's fucking great!

[MNLonghorn10]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

I've gotta say it's quite an experience to take the brunt of a full on Shag attack. I mean I've read 'em, contributed to 'em, and laughed at 'em for years, but when the barrel is pointed directly at you it's something else. I think 'GhostOfTomChoad' was my favorite bit.
that should've been done the same minute you found out it was on saturday night at 7:30.

and yes, taking the brunt from shaggy sucks. it's like a bunch of critters that just attack you from all directions.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

You still need some sort of punishment for even bringing this nonsense to the Shag. I mean really, missing Senior Day for a movie? Why would you even allow that thought to enter her head?

C'mon, what would the Shag do if things like this weren't vented here? The Shag must be fed raw meat from time to time. It's like Pacino's Vincent Hanna in Heat. It's gotta be out there moving in the dark...on the edge...keeps it sharp.

[Bob Lives!]

I still don't like you.

[llogg]

This is what you get for marrying a 13 year old.This post did not get enough credit on this thread. Also, it would have been worth it if the twin sister was in play as part of the "all doors are open" bit. I figured that was the whole reason for mentioning that she had a twin. Also would have been worth it if it implied she was one of the Bush twins and you got to go NLAA for a week.

[CPHornFan]

I am a woman. I can't imagine being the kind of woman who would do something like this. Good lord, no wonder you guys think women are ridiculously needy bitches. Who's raising these idiotic girls to be so, so, ... I think devious might be the right word. "If you really love me you'll go to this movie with me, even though you'll hate it." Bah! You guys need to start looking for the sensible, confident in herself, kind of woman, who won't play these stupid, stupid games.

Yep, that would be my wife. She knows that every Saturday & Sunday I'm in front of the TV watching the Longhorns and the Cowboys and she's fine with it. She has her stuff and I have mine and that's the way it should be.

[Beau Vine]

What everyone said.

[Urinal Cake]

if you're going to be a fag do the matinee you retard

[GraciePie]

Have you tried explaining to the wife that the Twilight movie will be playing every single day, multiple times a day, for the rest of the year?

She sounds like a bitch.

[UTEX90]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

I've gotta say it's quite an experience to take the brunt of a full on Shag attack. I mean I've read 'em, contributed to 'em, and laughed at 'em for years, but when the barrel is pointed directly at you it's something else. I think 'GhostOfTomChoad' was my favorite bit.

Im falling into the, "This wasn't real" camp. But way to stir the pot.

[Horny04]

I'm falling into the "He's just saying that they changed their plans but in reality his wife still has his balls in a lockbox and they're gonna be eating popcorn and watching teen vampires on Saturday night" camp.

[Scooter]

I still don't like you.

:lol:

[smoky b]

I refuse to believe we have fans like this...

[Deguello]

This can't be real.

[hitbyatrain]

Wait. All this bullshit AND YOU'RE NOT EVEN GOING TO THE GAME?

This isn't over. No fucking way.

[rtchorn]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

I've gotta say it's quite an experience to take the brunt of a full on Shag attack. I mean I've read 'em, contributed to 'em, and laughed at 'em for years, but when the barrel is pointed directly at you it's something else. I think 'GhostOfTomChoad' was my favorite bit.

I have less respect for you for having changed it. You're really going to let a bunch of message board idiots dictate what you do? That's dumber than skipping the game to watch Twilight.

[horngrad03]

I'm falling into the "He's just saying that they changed their plans but in reality his wife still has his balls in a lockbox and they're gonna be eating popcorn and watching teen vampires on Saturday night" camp.

+1

And I'm calliny my fiancee to tell her I love her because she would never pull this bullshit.

[hookemATL]

Maybe there is some type of compromise you could come to like...maybe you murder her with a rock or something, then you go to the game AND you dont have to see that shitty shit movie. Just an idea.

[longhrnfan]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.

Why?

Because my wife spent weeks getting us tickets to see Twilight: New Moon at the Drafthouse @ 7PM on Saturday.

Kill me.

you know... I'm a divorce attorney.

[qB1012]

I would go to alamo's site buy some tickets to an early afternoon show NOW

THIS!

[IPoopOnWhoop]

I have less respect for you for having changed it. You're really going to let a bunch of message board idiots dictate what you do? That's dumber than skipping the game to watch Twilight.
it's a lot worse that he had to ask in the first place.

[flaco]

So is the pooper offer off the table now?

[Eastwood22]

It's not like this date hasn't been on the calendar since last year. I find your lack of foresight disturbing.

[qB1012]

if you're going to be a fag do the matinee you retard

and this made me lol in class.

[Sii]

you still better at least get pooper out of this and give her a big cum blast to the face

[skipperj]

FWIW, there are still tickets available at both the Lake Creek and Village locations for the 7:00/7:15 showing on Saturday night. Doesn't sound like it was that hard a ticket to get.

So, if she claims she was "trying for weeks" to get them, so she just bought them when they released new tickets, call her on her bullshit.

And don't give me any BS about you living south so want to go to the South Lamar location. I live south and go to Village all the time if the times are better.

[CaptainEd]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.

Why?

Because my wife spent weeks getting us tickets to see Twilight: New Moon at the Drafthouse @ 7PM on Saturday.

Kill me.
what the fuck.

[elguapo]

Her attitude about this Saturday (although she's also a Texas Ex & huge 'horn fan; even named our 2nd cat Major) is "it's fucking Kansas, we'll beat them by 40 points" so therefore it's more important that I show her how much I respect things she's passionate about & sacrifice a little for her.
You're wife is passionate about Twilight? Seriously?

What's next? Are you going to miss the Big 12 championship to go to the spa with her because "it's fucking Nebraska, we'll beat them by 40 points"?

[aaronisnotcool]

well its good that you compromised with you wife. i have no problems with what he would've done on saturday.

[Beau Vine]

The only saving grace is having a chip in the big game. I can hold this shit over her head for fucking years to come. This will get me out of numerous future weddings, reunions, etc., by simply bringing up the "remember the time we missed Colt's last game @ Texas to go see a teenage vampire flick?"


I can't believe you're this stupid. This is not how it works.

You have committed a humongous error: YOU HAVE TO MARK YOUR TERRITORY.

And not only did you NOT mark your territory this time, you also gave it up for a stupid teenage vamp movie. This sends a very strong message that not only does this territory not belong to you, but also that you will cede this territory for just about anything. You have effectively told her that you are willing to miss a Texas game for things like weddings, reunions, etc. You've got nothing to hold over her head, but you will be paying for this mistake for years to come.

Your grade is F-minus.

[Urinal Cake]

This thread has amazing legs. Well done all.

[WeAreTX]

I'm falling into the "He's just saying that they changed their plans but in reality his wife still has his balls in a lockbox and they're gonna be eating popcorn and watching teen vampires on Saturday night" camp.

I would like to join this camp as well. Where do I sign up?

[Deguello]

I can't believe you're this stupid. This is not how it works.

You have committed a humongous error: YOU HAVE TO MARK YOUR TERRITORY.Pretty much this.

Last February my wife's brother scheduled a wedding for a Saturday in September. I didn't even know about it until it got called off because everyone, my wife included, knew there was no chance in hell that I was going to miss a Texas football game for his wedding. They didn't waste their time, or mine, even asking about it.

My pre-teen daughters wouldn't choose Twilight over going to a Texas game. They'll be there cheering Saturday night.

You are so screwed.

[ravenhand]

So not only will I not be at Senior Day this Saturday to see Colt break the all time wins record as well as send off the seniors in style, I won't even be able to watch it at home or in a sports bar.

Why?

Because my wife spent weeks getting us tickets to see Twilight: New Moon at the Drafthouse @ 7PM on Saturday.

Kill me.
I am so lucky my wife understand how I feel about watching Texas Football. She even planned our wedding so that it would not interfere with the Longhorn football season. If she has something planned for us during the weekend that the Longhorns play she will ask what time the game starts so that she can plan around it, I love her and she really loves me.

[Jersey Man10]

Fuck Twilight.

[Trumpette09]

Your wife sucks.

[austingirl]

I am a woman. I can't imagine being the kind of woman who would do something like this. Good lord, no wonder you guys think women are ridiculously needy bitches. Who's raising these idiotic girls to be so, so, ... I think devious might be the right word. "If you really love me you'll go to this movie with me, even though you'll hate it." Bah! You guys need to start looking for the sensible, confident in herself, kind of woman, who won't play these stupid, stupid games.

Took the words out of my mouth. Why in God's name would I drag my husband to a movie he obviously didn't want to see? Regardless of whether or not he had to miss a game?

[Foxyhorn]

Took the words out of my mouth. Why in God's name would I drag my husband to a movie he obviously didn't want to see? Regardless of whether or not he had to miss a game?

Ditto. Would never, ever think of even asking my husband to do something like this. Even if I did, he is not a pussy and would tell tell me F No!

[UTEX90]

You three ladies need to have an internvention with OP's wife.

[Ruby Soho]

Yup, come Saturday night, this towel-wiper will be watching Twilight with the rest of Austin's 13yo girls.

[Jersey Man10]

You should post that on FML.com.

[creasy]

Shhhhh... This is what GOTJ is REALLY doing for his 40th... (http://www.hotelchatter.com/story/2009/11/18/213838/19/hotels/The_Only_Thing_These_New_Moon_Hotels_Are_Missing_i s_Edward_Cullen) He didn't want to brag.

[froghorn717]

this has been the best dogpile, ever. oh sorry...EVER.

[bigup2dahorns]

my suggestion is that you show up in panchochat on saturday evening to prove you are not in fact at said movie. yeah yeah yeah i know you are supposed to now watch the game at a neighbor's house, just tell them it is a matter of life and death that you borrow their computer for a little bit.

[smoky b]

my suggestion is that you show up in panchochat on saturday evening to prove you are not in fact at said movie. yeah yeah yeah i know you are supposed to now watch the game at a neighbor's house, just tell them it is a matter of life and death that you borrow their computer for a little bit.
doesn't alamo have wi-fi?

[Wally Pryor]

Wow...with the way it's week to week with television and the kick times for our games, my other half knows that nothing gets scheduled on Saturday unless we first discuss it. For all intents and purposes, Saturdays in the fall are off limits. As they should be.

[balakris]

Meh...I call bullshit.

[eATMe]

YOU HAVE TO MARK YOUR TERRITORY.


Pee on your wife.

[NEwherebutA&M]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

Even if this is real, you go to the trouble to post and embarrass yourself about it here, and now you're still not even going to the game? FAIL.

[Brad Wesley]

the reason my marriage is successful is because she knows even asking for something like this would end in divorce.

my wife is going to see that stupid fucking movie tomorrow night with her friend while i hang with the kids. in exchange, she's going to let me get super Colt McCoy shitfaced and watch him ninja fuck the fat mangino's.

married life ain't bad for dudes who set the expectations early.

[crackamacgowski]

the reason my marriage is successful is because she knows even asking for something like this would end in divorce.

my wife is going to see that stupid fucking movie tomorrow night with her friend while i hang with the kids. in exchange, she's going to let me get super Colt McCoy shitfaced and watch him ninja fuck the fat mangino's.

married life ain't bad for dudes who [s:7ba9f773fb]set the expectations early[/s:7ba9f773fb] beat their wives.

That's right. I said it.

[texashorne]

My wife got Mama Mia last Christmas and I swear she made me watch that shit for simple reason that she new I hated it and it would prove my love by making some sort of sacrifice.

Dude, what's sad is your wife probably doesn't like the movie, she running some kind of test and maliciously doing this on purpose.

[wide-e-wide]

THIS is totally unacceptable and you will go down in Shaggy history "Wideman Christmas lights story" style. No matter what you do
in life or on this board from this moment on will EVER take away from the fact that you are "that guy from the Twilight thread". Good luck with that shit.

[creasy]

THIS is totally unacceptable and you will go down in Shaggy history "Wideman Christmas lights story" style.

Well wide-e-wide, this is far worse. You've got that going for you.

[texashorne]

This thread is good for my marriage. Ever since reading it I have begun to love my wife even more. She is going to the Big 12 game with me. She is awesome.
At any rate, my buddy's wife bought 5 tickets to a Beach Boys concert last year, during the Tech game. And of the 5 that she "wifed" into going, 3 were die hard longhorn fans.

[SubliminalHorn]

THIS is totally unacceptable and you will go down in Shaggy history "Wideman Christmas lights story" style. No matter what you do
in life or on this board from this moment on will EVER take away from the fact that you are "that guy from the Twilight thread". Good luck with that shit.

I was just about to say that the rest of your shaggy career will be defined by this thread. May god have mercy on your soul.

[r2k3982]

Some one put this on the classics STAT!!!!

[TexArcher]

I am a woman. I can't imagine being the kind of woman who would do something like this. Good lord, no wonder you guys think women are ridiculously needy bitches. Who's raising these idiotic girls to be so, so, ... I think devious might be the right word. "If you really love me you'll go to this movie with me, even though you'll hate it." Bah! You guys need to start looking for the sensible, confident in herself, kind of woman, who won't play these stupid, stupid games.

I want to be on you.

[scottsins]

ALL women want to be with a man. You are acting like a bitch. She may act like this makes her happy, but it does not.

[TheCruiser]

I think the bigger issue is not that he's missing the UT game, it's that based on the movie he's going to see, this man is apparently married to a 15 year old and thus, may be a pedophile.

[GhostOfTomJoad]

THIS is totally unacceptable and you will go down in Shaggy history "Wideman Christmas lights story" style. No matter what you do
in life or on this board from this moment on will EVER take away from the fact that you are "that guy from the Twilight thread". Good luck with that shit.

Yeah, I figure this is my equivalent of Crayon being a bridesmaid. What the hell. Have a laugh on me.

[crackamacgowski]

I think the bigger issue is not that he's missing the UT game, it's that based on the movie he's going to see, this man is apparently married to a 15 year old and thus, may be a pedophile.

If you don't, someone else will.

[TrashMaster G]

Yeah, I figure this is my equivalent of Crayon being a bridesmaid. What the hell. Have a laugh on me.

Are you going to borrow crayon's dress for your date?

[Foxyhorn]

My wife got Mama Mia last Christmas and I swear she made me watch that shit for simple reason that she new I hated it and it would prove my love by making some sort of sacrifice.


I really don't understand women who make their husbands watch girl movies/tv shows with them. why? Are you not secure enough to watch it by yourself on one tv while your husband watches football or something else manly in another room? Do you not have girlfriends to watch with?

[mez2]

OK, OK...everything's cool. Tix have been swapped out for a Sunday showing. We'll be watching the game w/ some new neighbors of ours who moved in down the street a few weeks ago.

I've gotta say it's quite an experience to take the brunt of a full on Shag attack. I mean I've read 'em, contributed to 'em, and laughed at 'em for years, but when the barrel is pointed directly at you it's something else. I think 'GhostOfTomChoad' was my favorite bit.

sellout.

[Snacks]

you were probably going to get a blowjob for going on saturday. i'm just sayin.

you gotta ignore some of these cats. they believe in bros before hoes.

[creasy]

you were probably going to get a blowjob for going on saturday. i'm just sayin.

if getting a bj is such a big deal that you even considered going through all that bullshit, you married the wrong woman. i'm just sayin'.

[MrPhlegm]

Well wide-e-wide, this is far worse. You've got that going for you.

this is worse even than the male bridesmaid situation.

[StregaHorn]

if getting a bj is such a big deal that you even considered going through all that bullshit, you married the wrong woman. i'm just sayin'.

This.

I feel really bad for a lot of the married guys on this site.

Then again, I have never really gotten along with most of my fellow women. Too fussy and manipulative. FYI, the women here on the Shag are obviously exceptions :) How you men put up with the stuff you do, I have no idea.

The last time a man treated me like some of your wives treat you, he was kicked to the curb...quickly.

[slorch]

THIS is totally unacceptable and you will go down in Shaggy history "Wideman Christmas lights story" style. No matter what you do
in life or on this board from this moment on will EVER take away from the fact that you are "that guy from the Twilight thread". Good luck with that shit.

Only difference is your tale is funny as hell.

The Twilight Zone on the other hand is just plain disgusting.

[MaximumBarnes]

I feel really bad for a lot of the married guys on this site.
Why? It's their fault. The ones who complain about having to be subservient to their wives' demands are dickless little bitches who deserve what they get. Women run amok in our society because men tuck their dicks between their legs, curl up in a fetal position, and suck their thumbs whenever a woman threatens to get mad. It's a product of the pussification of America. We are a society of men raised by women who never knew anything but being subservient to women. It's fucking pathetic and disgusting.

[crackamacgowski]

Why? It's their fault. The ones who complain about having to be subservient to their wives' demands are dickless little bitches who deserve what they get. Women run amok in our society because men tuck their dicks between their legs, curl up in a fetal position, and suck their thumbs whenever a woman threatens to get mad. It's a product of the pussification of America. We are a society of men raised by women who never knew anything but being subservient to women. It's fucking pathetic and disgusting.

Jesus Fucking Christ. MB in '12.

[sirion]

This is what you get for marrying a 13 year old.

[StregaHorn]

Why? It's their fault. The ones who complain about having to be subservient to their wives' demands are dickless little bitches who deserve what they get. Women run amok in our society because men tuck their dicks between their legs, curl up in a fetal position, and suck their thumbs whenever a woman threatens to get mad. It's a product of the pussification of America. We are a society of men raised by women who never knew anything but being subservient to women. It's fucking pathetic and disgusting.

Well said.

However, in some cases, the woman doesn't go full out batshit until AFTER the wedding (I have a really good friend this happened to). Then it is cheaper to just put up with it.

[Eastwood22]

Women don't care when you get mad. Why should you care when they get mad?

[Thatboyb]

you were probably going to get a blowjob for going on saturday. i'm just sayin.

you gotta ignore some of these cats. they believe in bros before hoes.

yeah but if you a real man you tell her hell naw and that she better be home in time to give me a BJ after the game. :beer:

[r2k3982]

you were probably going to get a blowjob for going on saturday. i'm just sayin.

you gotta ignore some of these cats. they believe in bros before hoes.

yeah but if you a real man you tell her hell naw and that she better be home in time to give me a BJ after the game. :beer:Even the noob knows better than GOTJ.

[Mr. Furley]

GOTJ:

PM me your address. I've got some Josh Groban CD's I'm trying to get rid of. You seem like the perfect candidate.

[burntorangebongos]

you may as well go ahead and divorce her and just start over with a new chick.
you done f'd up the balance of power with this one.