its not a great show by any means, but its good enough for a tune in each week.
its not a great show by any means, but its good enough for a tune in each week.
Not enough tail on this show. The sister is the best looking one I guess.
So why did the Chief get replaced? Because he's a moron?
Also, Holder submitted his own backpack instead of Rosie's, but the tech still found Rosie's blood? So the Forensic guy is crooked too?
A lot to digest last night. I love that Stan went back to the mob to get $#@! done
I havent watched the new one yet. I'm all mixed up in my emotion
okay we watched season 1 in 2 days. it's a bit slow moving but a bit addictive, I kind of knew what was going to happen at the end.
Jesus titty$#@! pissdicks, where do I start? My wife rolled her eyeballs when I grabbed a pen and paper before pressing play. Only because the second hour was comparatively smoother and less idiotic (or maybe because I was already defeated and/or weary of documenting every little droplet that missed the bowl) was I spared from having to get a second piece of paper to continue taking notes. The first hour (unsurprisingly, the one written and produced by Peena Pooed) was so sloppy, it should have been sponsored exclusively by Manwich. In approximate chronological order:
Angsty Adolescent Son knew that Richmond had been shot well before Ginger Cop did. That in and of itself is preposterous, but once we start peeling back layers of this stinky little onion, it becomes even more ludicrous. The story was broadcast on the television mounted directly above the airport bathroom she was using. And yet she didn’t notice the story when she went into the bathroom or when she came out. That’s some fine detective work there, Lou. However, airport televisions (at least at major international airports like SeaTac) are usually not tuned to local channels, and I don’t believe for an instant that the shooting of a Seattle mayoral candidate arrested for murder would merit a live break-in to national programming on CNN or the like. But for the sake of argument, let’s assume that this TV was airing a local station and not a national one. That leads us to conclude that the shooting either occurred during the nightly news anyway, or else the story cut into whatever was being aired at the time. I don’t know exactly what time we were supposed to assume this all took place, but based on Ginger Cops previous half dozen aborted efforts to move her and her son to San Francisco via airplane, it’s probably an 11:00 or midnight flight. So the Seattle/Tacoma International Airport must have been airing Letterman, Leno, Kimmel, Ferguson, etc., on the wall mounted TVs throughout the terminal. Sure. And maybe the story hadn’t broken yet when she went into the can and she didn’t see the TV above her as she was leaving the restroom. Or, knowing her, perhaps she spent 45 minutes on the $#@!ter daydreaming and fiddling with her balls while her pissy emo son brooded alone in the concourse. I suppose this is a reasonable enough assumption to make, given the characteristic sloppiness of this self-proclaimed ‘highly realistic, non-stylized’ procedural crime drama. Same goes for the fact that nobody bothered to actually call Ginger Cop to tell her what had happened. Sure, they might have all known that she was supposed to be on a plane at the time and would therefore be unreachable, but I’m pretty sure that at least some of the other police officers, reporters, miscellaneous players, etc., would realize that maybe this development might warrant leaving her a voicemail so that she’d learn the news as soon as she turned her phone back on. The season premiere is just breaking out of the gates with guns blazing. 30 seconds in and there’s already a plot device so riddled with holes that it can only be held together with tenuous, gaping, and unlikely assumptions.
While it makes more sense in hindsight now that we know that the Chief (or whatever rank her supervising officer is) is dirty and in on the whole vast conspiracy, I find it insulting that as viewers, we’re supposed to accept his stubborn resistance and insistence on stonewalling the case in spite of the new evidence that has come to light. However, I find it perfectly plausible that this doesn’t strike Ginger Cop as unusual or suspicious in any way. After all, she’s show time and again that she’s as dumb as a box of hair.
Ahh, the cliffhanger ending from last season makes perfect sense--the mysterious source of the doctored license plate photo was a character we’ve never seen before. Naturally!
Ginger Cop either has a key to her Chief’s house (unlikely), he doesn’t lock his doors at night (cops are usually such careless, trusting folk), or Ginger Cop was able to silently break into Chief’s house and rouse Stubborn Angsty Quarrelsome Son without making any noise.
Female Campaign Worker doesn’t seem to understand anything at the hospital. The doctor’s description of Richmond’s condition is met with her asking the doctor how he is doing. The basis for the doctor asking about Richmond’s religion goes totally over her head, as does the doctor’s recommendation to contact Richmond’s next of kin. She responds like that’s somehow contextually incongruous to her appraisal of the situation. “What? Notify his relatives that he’s been shot and could die at any minute? Why would we want to do that? Are you a real doctor?”
Unrealistic Incidence of Silence Part II: The mute throng of frenzied reporters, silently but aggressively huddled three inches from the Larsen family’s front door.
At the random police station when she’s checking out the backstory of the doctored photograph, Ginger Cop gave the desk clerk a bogus name. Then immediately answered her phone “Linden.” right in front of that same desk clerk.
How did Holder know where to find Sullen Emo Son Desperately Longing For A Father Figure?
And how was I Hate My Socially And Maternally Incompetent Mother Son supposed to have known not to have gone with Holder or to have trusted him? It’s not like she’s ever told him a goddamn thing, or ever bothered explaining even the most mundane details of the case or sharing personal information regarding her relationship with Holder.
These Larsen kids are going to believe in Santa Claus until they’re in their mid 50s. Kids: “Where’s our mom?” Dad: “Just eat your breakfast.” Breakfast is eaten and no further questions are asked.
I love how Female Campaign Worker so authoritatively states how Richmond came back all wet but it didn’t rain that night. Bull$#@!. It rains all the goddamn time in that place. So often that a wet person shouldn’t ever seem out of the ordinary.
Gosh, do you think that Escapes His Rudderless Untethered Life Through Comic Books Son’s clumsily introduced comic book is going to hold the key to identifying the anime/manga character tattoo from the Rosie bike mirror photograph that the random police officer so unwaveringly declared as “some Japanese cartoon character” or whatever? I’m no anime expert, but how in the world could a person (a presumably competent detective, no less) automatically deduce that the character in the tattoo is Japanese? There wasn’t anything stylistically obvious to me that it was Japanese in origin. Whatever.
Nothing like family bonding over a cozy dinner of vending machine snacks. “Sure son, you can have another bag of chips.” “Aww shucks, Mom, I sure do love you! You’re the best!”
Balko’s “You can tell I’m crazy because I’m rocking back and forth” act is every bit as realistic of a depiction of a crazy person as the dweebs (at least based on what I’ve gleaned from commercials—I’ll be damned if I ever actually watch that show) from The Big Bang Theory are realistic examples of how smart people act. Both are poor, clumsy, ignorant approximations by outsiders who don’t know any better but don’t realize that they don’t know any better.
Ginger Cop has to rely on a reporter to do investigative work. Seems about right.
How the $#@! was Stan—a man facing serious criminal charges himself, and the father of the murder victim allegedly killed by the man Balko just shot while that man was in police custody—allowed to visit Balko in jail, totally unsupervised, just a few hours after the fact? This isn’t prison, where you’re allowed visitation rights to see family members every so often. What, is Stan Balko’s lawyer or something? Keep patting yourself on the back for how unfailingly realistic your TV show is, Veena. Keep telling yourself that it’s not a rotten pile of frustrating, annoying, clumsy, ugly, and ignorant dog$#@!, too.
Another lazy, unrealistic, unbelievable, aching stretch of writing out of Veena where Balko (off camera, of course—$#@! actually making the effort to show how such an outrageous chain of events that could only be the result of about a dozen different grossly negligent oversights actually happened—really strong stuff, Veena) gets the drop on the cop and goes all action hero on us. This development was so shamefully, pitifully, embarrassingly terrible that this whole charade has to be an April Fools’ joke, right? And the second hour of the season premiere is the real episode?
Nope. I guess that whole traveshamockery wasn’t just another bad joke by Veena at the expense of her viewers. So we’re really sticking with that whole octopus$#@! as part of the storyline?
In keeping with this season’s emerging theme of “hey, $#@! it—why would we want to notify anyone of anything”, at what point is someone going to tell the Larsens about Balko?
Ginger Cop didn’t bother obtaining a pesky search warrant to rifle the house of a man, who, despite her beliefs and motivations, is still currently under arrest for the murder of a teenaged girl. I guess in Veena’s “hyper realistic, so realistic you won’t even $#@!ing believe it, but seriously, just trust me, I understand the $#@! out of criminal procedure—after all, I wrote pulpy schlock for the paragons of realistic crime dramas at CBS for a number of years. I’m the real deal and you’re all just too stupid and ignorant to realize what a brilliant merger of art, entertainment, and Real Live Law Enforcement I’m graciously bestowing on you” little world, this is perfectly plausible detective work. Oh, my bad—I forgot the whole “keys clandestinely obtained in earnest from unrelated parties who themselves have no standing to grant consent to a search” exception to the Fourth Amendment. You know, plain sight, searches incident to arrest, exigent circumstances, key provided by a lover, Terry stops, etc. It’s all there in the caselaw. It’s 1L $#@!, really. Just trust Veena.
I love how Stan is totally bewildered about how to tell his boys about Balko, and yet he’s so cavalierly bullshitting them about their mother for the past few days. More iron-clad internal consistency. And how long was he sitting there, stewing in stasis, between the time he learned of Balco’s blaze of glory and we returned to him? Long enough for Holder to tell him, get to the station, fiddle around with the backpacks, etc.
This whole bit with Squirrely Campaign Manager being emotionally/physically/spiritually/cognitively unable to break the news about the paralysis to Richmond is totally unnecessary. It’s also wholly unbelievable, given that we’ve been beaten over the head with the “cool, calculating, dispassionate reptile who always knows what to do in every situation” thing all along. And if it’s supposed to be some kind of “look, he’s human and vulnerable” device, then at least leave off the “and possibly mentally retarded, too” element of having him seem to think it’s perfectly reasonable for him to demand that the nurse on call go interrupt the doctor IN THE MIDDLE OF PERFORMING SURGERY ON ANOTHER PATIENT so that he can tell Richmond that he’s paralyzed and thereby saving Squirrely Campaign Manager the grief and trauma of having to do that himself. Or just letting Richmond figure that out on his own soon enough, just as the doctor recommended the last time Squirrel cranked up this particular jack-in-the-box. Instead, he just ran off and hid like every other willfully ignorant ostrich on this show. Is anyone in Seattle not a complete dumbass?
Ginger Cop, a woman who we know is a long-distance runner, was winded while talking on the phone after talking to the Fisherman Who Saw Everything.
Ginger Cop not thanking the DA, even after the DA basically said “Thank me, you socially inept, presumptuous, inconvenient, idiotic little twerp” but instead offering her very best quasi-grateful, pseudo-compassionate smirk should have prompted the DA to hurl the folder at Ginger Cop and telling her to get $#@!ed. So now we’re to believe that Ginger Cop is an Assburger or autistic or something?
Holder really should have figured out the whole photograph thing much sooner than he did. And once he did, and it became (or should have become…) clear to him that Ginger Cop was avoiding him and ignoring his calls, why didn’t he just text the bitch to say ‘look, I $#@!ed up, I know the score, and I’m going rogue and I’m on your side on all this—maybe we should, you know, meet and talk? Or at least talk on the phone or something?’
Larsen kids were carrying on about needing to get a dog to protect the house, Stan has been pissing and moaning about needing constant police protection/surveillance, the kids are arming themselves with weaponry in their little fort and talking about what to do in the event that the killer comes back to the house, and then two seconds later, they’re both clamoring to be the one to go get Cool Aunt’s cigs (by the way, I $#@!ing hate “cigs” and all people who use that expression) out of the car outside.
Speaking of cigs, this season so far just seems like one big anti-smoking commercial. I’m beginning to suspect that featuring cigarettes is nothing more than The Killing’s outright theft of The Godfather’s oranges.
Finally Stan is enlisting the help of the Polish Mafia. Good thing he waited for $#@! to get completely $#@!ed before involving them in anything more than just usurious loans to cover the Surprise House Payments.
This show had better pull its head out of its ass, at least a little bit. I don’t know if I can sit through it (and then gripe about all there is to gripe about) each week at this rate.
I've held out for two episodes. Should I catch up? Or just let it die in my DVR?
I think the fact that it was two hours worth of pig$#@! to slog through and that one of those hours was crafted by Veena both contributed to the overflow.
This is a show about nothing.
Hey....here's an idea. You have a guy, and people think he did something for a few seconds, but then he didn't really do anything. Hey, there's a show! That's a show. It's a show about nothing.
You've got a girl, and she disappears. And then people say she didn't disappear. And then people say she did disappear. And then a bag shows up. The VERY bag she was wearing the night she may have or may not have disappeared. Hey, there's a show, that's an episode.
It's a show about nothing. You eat, you go shopping, you accuse someone of murder. Show about nothing.
I'm so happy I deleted this show off of my DVR's season pass list.
I found myself fast forwarding through parts of the last episode. That's not a good sign for this season
I hope it can settle the "who killed what's her face" soon it's been more than 1 season spent on it. Even "24" moved on after a season. I mean the show it okay it keeps me intrigued. And thanks to the show I wouldn't want to live up there it rains waaaaaaaay to much it's so depressing!
I've got far less to say about this episode, likely because as Baboon pointed out, nothing really happened.
So Rosie's mom is finally back on planet Earth after a mysterious (2? 3? 4? 5? 500?) day absence. Where has she been this whole time? And what has she been doing? Was the entire interval spent en route to the random dismal $#@!ty hotel she ended up at? I expect the answer to this gaping plot hole and timeline discontinuity to be summarily avoided with nary an acknowledgement at all, or else it will likely fill a full episode later on (just like the incongruous "Detective Who May Or May Not Have Lost Her Son" episode last season), or hell, maybe it will for the entire basis for The Killing Season Three: You Thought That Sucked? You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet.
The parallel we're-adults-but-not-authority-figures forced slang coolguy interactions between Holder and that kid of some only occasionally important relation to him and Cool Aunt Terri with the Larsen moppets were both written by someone's clueless aunt, the same aunt who reliably thinks she's buying her nieces and nephews the latest stylish gifts, when in actuality and without fail, she only buys the $#@!ty Chinese knockoff versions of things a year after the peak of the fad/style/trend has crested and at which time even the original trendsetting gear would make for a underwhelming gift.
What was the deal with the giant high heeled shoe in Holder's backpack? Are we to infer that he's a cross dresser?
I'm growing increasingly annoyed by the fact that nobody on this show has ever sent anyone a text message. Remember 10 or 12 years ago when sitcom writers were still bullishly trying to continue writing storylines that would only work in a world where cell phones didn't exist? That's what The Killing is doing with the whole tired "calling and leaving a voicemail for the person that's avoiding your calls because they're mistaken about something and if you could only figure out a way to get a simple message to them, they'd finally understand the situation as it really is" song and dance between Ginger Cop and Holder. And lest you think that this plot device is an unfortunate but necessary holdover due to the fact that the original Danish program was written in an era predating the widespread use of SMS, keep in mind that it aired in early 2007, when even your cornball aunt who is perennially a year or two behind the times was at least rudimentarily familiar with text messaging.
After 37 minutes, there hasn't been a single non-awkward, non-clumsy, non-painful scene yet.
Ginger Cop, upon receipt of the email containing video and stills from the security cameras at the Beujolais Shoe Factory/Server Farm fire: "I can't open the attachments!" Random cop on the phone with her: "Click the download attachment button." Seriously?
The Despondent Holder In The Middle Of The Street scene reminded me of this video for a Thom Yorke song:
This episode was titled "Numb". They were just one letter off the mark...
re:text messaging - it's something they've annoyingly avoided by adding the one small back and forth near the beginning (and repeated it since) of linden saying she doesn't really get into the technology of cell phones, because she's "seen what it's done to my son" who plays games and whatnot on his cell. it would work just fine if she was a small town sheriff, but she's a detective in seattle, so now it's just a hindrance.
Fair points, PoD. I just finished watching last week's episode. Yeah, amazingly my drunken Seinfeld rant was in reference to the Pilot, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to sit through 48 torturous minutes of the episode appropriately titled "Numb". For that is how I feel after watching it.
I am definitely willing to concede that I may not be fully grasping what the writers may be calling "the plot" because I lose interest and find myself checking twitter or Shaggy or whatnot during the, um, slow times of the show. But man, what the $#@!. I don't think I understand what the purpose was of a single thing that happened in that episode. The only thing I'm taking out of it is that tattoo guy/killer guy works for Stan and/or the Polish mafia (the irony is thick, eh?).
Why is Rosie's mom whoring herself out? What was in the box in the hotel room? Why was Rosie's mom at a fleabag motel in the heart of the rainy ghetto, anyway? Why is Holder stealing drugs and then using them to have sex with an ugly junkie whore? Why haven't the awkward silences between Stan and semi-hot Aunt Escort spiraled into hateful anger sex?
I just don't know. Why I continue to watch this. I think it is for the Prepuce write ups. Don't give up, Prepuce, don't ever give up.
Starting this week's episode.
Prepuce, I respect your authority to go wherever you want with this, but I motion to stop calling Linden "Ginger Cop" and start calling her "Frigid $#@!". Any chance you can get with this? It would make my life just a little bit more enjoyable.
So Frigid $#@! is finally getting called out on leaving her 15 year old kid in a scumbag motel all day/night while she chases a fake killer? Wow. Seattle CPS is totes on their game.
Going to bed, we can continue this in 6-7 days when I can muster up the boredom (errrr, motivation) to watch again. $#@! you Veena Sud, you insufferable $#@!.
I have no idea how y'all can keep watching this, but I enjoy reading about how terrible it is. So carry on.
Glad to see there are still 2 people that are watching this show. I hope you guys spend a lot of money on the advertisers of AMC.
So they've known all along that Stan used to be in the Polish mafia? But they're just now getting around to asking the FBI for a list of people that Stan whacked? Sounds about right.
Keep plugging PoD.
so the son of a guy that s. larsen killed, killed rosie as payback. and possibly to bring stan back into the mob.
that's what i'm getting out of all this.
i guess the rest of it is unraveling how the sherriff's dept is involved in the subterfuge.
the story is getting more convoluted and confusing, and i'm losing interest in paying attention, so basically i have no idea what is going on.
Show is the suck. The premium suck. Gandorlph your buddy is a pretty good actor but I would pay him at least ten or twenty bucks to go kick someone who might be writing or directing this bollocks in the middle of the crotch. Let me know, I have paypal.
So nobody watches this show anymore?? I think before the end, we will see the sister in law half-naked. The scene with her and Stan gave me a sem-boner
I fast forward at times but I still watch. I'm pot committed at this point
Still paying attention. I think every chick on the show is going to die from lung cancer.
I haven't watched Sunday's episode yet. Honestly, I am willing to let it go at this point. The only thing that can save me is if Prepuce is still in.
I'm an episode behind.
I watched the previous two episodes back to back late last week. I though the first of those (Ogi Yu-Gi-Oh or whatever) was noticeably not that terrible (relative to the other most recent 8-10 episodes, of course) but then the following one (Ghosts of the Stupid) was so goddamn awful that it immediately undid any goodwill that the previous episode had sparked.
I seethed about so many different things that were stupid, cheesy, unbelievable, illogical, impossible, inexplicable, chronologically implausible, and just plain terrible that I elected not to write anything once I realized I couldn't write only a little bit, and to do it justice would have blown my earlier treatises out of the water in terms of the individual, nuanced layers of suck I'd feel compelled to address. In particular, the diner scene with Drifter Mom and Rosie By Proxy was so outrageously awkward and ill-written that it's abundantly clear that the writers of this show have little regard for their viewers. I was insulted after watching it. My blood pressure has risen just writing that much.
This show is so far below the Mendoza line that it requires some additional metric to do it justice. It's four or five standard deviations below Mendoza. It's so $#@!awful that to describe it's $#@!awfulness is such a monumental undertaking that for all practical purposes, it's impossible. This show is so bad that it is literally impossible to fully recount how bad it is.
You know how there are some African tribesmen who are so unbelievably black that they are none more blacker to the degree that they cease to be dark and impossibly, they somehow begin to be bright? They've gone so far to an extreme that they're on the return side of the blackness orbit? That's this show. It's Bright Tribesman bad.
Last edited by Prepuce of Doom; 05-02-2012 at 12:29 PM. Reason: Mike's mom is Veena Sud.
I'm still "watching" and by that I mean I have the TV on for an hour before Mad Men. I think I caught half of last week's episode. How many episodes are left? Yawn.
Yeoman service by Prepuce in keeping us abreast of the suckiness.
Thanks for trying Prepuce. I was wondering how you were coming along with the recaps. When you didn't post last week, I figured you chunked a brick through your television.
The show is so bad now, that I find myself rooting for it to somehow become even worse. To become the Ford Edsel, if you will, of television.
I did laugh in the last episode when Richie Rich, or little lord $#@!face, reminded Holder that he was white. But I was seriously disappointed that Linden didn't celebrate her son's remarkable test score by taking him down to the vending machine for a celebratory zagnut or at least some funyuns. Bitch.
Need a PoD update. I can't believe they'll wack the only character worth a $#@! just to get a rise out of Ginger.
I'm at the point where I'm deriving most of my enjoyment from pretending that Stan Larsen is Louis C.K.
I'm no expert on the whole jurisdictional quagmire of tribal lands and the sovereignty of their leaders, but I have a hard time believing that it's perfectly reasonable for the tribe to brazenly beat Holder to death while Ginger Cop and/or Generic Apathetic Commanding Officer is listening on the phone. This show is no stranger to stretching credibility and running roughshod over the realities of our legal system, but this development is even more outrageous and egregious than all their previous liberties taken combined.
If they actually kill Holder, the entire remaining cast of characters will only feature those who are some combination of unlikable, contemptible, annoying, frustrating, and/or unrealistic. Holder is literally the only non-terrible character on the show. I root for every single other person on screen to get some sort of se7en/Saw/Seinfeldian comeuppance.
I wish there was some way I could fully and accurately convey my utter disdain for this show to the people responsible for it, and to explain that the only reason I continue to watch is because of the tremendous loathing that they have inspired in me. In a way, it's quite remarkable--I'm not sure I've ever been so emotionally moved by a television program.
I hate their $#@!ing guts and I hope they choke.
I think I've given up. I'm about 3 episodes behind right now and it's going to be REALLY difficult to find the motivation to catch up.
Maybe if I decide to give up drinking next week I will be bored enough that I have nothing else to do latenight but catch up. Then again, the show is waaay more fun to watch after a few beers because then I get amused at the idiot-syncracies, rather than annoyed.
I am watching episode "The Opening" right now. There is no doubt that I've absolutely lost interest. I am %(this is me searching for the asterisk in the dark but not caring enough to actually find it)BARELY# still following the plot. I really don't get it. But that's not the funny part.
The funny part is that it seems like they're making this $#@! up as they go along. Almost like every two episodes are independent of the preceding two episodes. Oh wait....THAT plot line didn't work out? Let's abandon it and start a new one. It's $#@!ing comical. Me and my HS buddies could have come up with something more entertaining than this. How did this $#@! get this kind of bus pass?
Football .. Basketball .. Baseball .. Other Sports .. RC Didn't Offer .. Gamboool
Varsity .. Hole in the Wall .. PCL .. Einstein's .. Nasty's .. GM Steakhouse .. NSAA
Bada Bing .. Can you help me with this? .. Shagslist .. Cloak Room .. Classics .. Bellmont