Ask a black man.... Now With MS Paint pg. 13

[neverwenttoUT]

Seems the biggest representation of the black culture on this site has been Derka Derka and I just can't let that slide anymore. I am sure there are other black posters on this site but none really stand out. I can tell the closest some of you come to knowing any black people is by watching our basketball and football teams so I am giving you the opportunity to ask away. If you ask a serious question I'll give you a serious answer, so ask away..........

[hookemATL]

Did OJ do it?

[neverwenttoUT]

P.S. You're black?

Yes I am, why? Interested? I am in the Houston area if you want to, you know

Did OJ do it?

It would be un-black of me to say he didn't do it. So take what you want away from that.

[jt]

wtf is it w/ y'all and big asses?

[Cluttered]

Do you think the USA owes you reparations?

[Ducksmith]

Do you have a seperate wieght limit for white women than you do for black women?

Answer from the perspective of your father or your father figure...put the following in order of favorite to least favorite

1.Hispanic
2. white
3. asian
4. middle eastern
5. british
6. canadian
7. french
8. indian feather
9. indian dot

Big Red or grape/orange soda?

[Cluttered]

^^^

To follow up his last question....Do you know what juice is?

[neverwenttoUT]

wtf is it w/ y'all and big asses?

Who doesn't like a big ass? The view plus hitting it from the back while grabbing and slapping ass as hard as you want because they really can't feel it anyway? Nothing defeats that. If you haven't tried it JT I would have to ask that you give it a go. There is no better view. You need a hook up I got you, just let me know!

Do you think the USA owes you reparations?

Nope, slaves should have asked for a raise.

[Ducksmith]

Why does black man hate the little sharp tooth short horn jew so much?

[neverwenttoUT]

Do you have a seperate wieght limit for white women than you do for black women?

Answer from the perspective of your father or your father figure...put the races in order of favorite to least favorite

1.Hispanic
2. white
3. asian
4. middle eastern
5. british
6. canadian
7. french
8. indian feather
9. indian dot

Big Red or grape/orange soda?

I like my white women built like a black women. Or they have to have some other really special feature to them. Most white girls just come across ordinary to me.

1. Hispanic
2.White(my father had a MAJOR crush on Pam Anderson during baywatch days)
3.French
4.Asian
5.Middle Eastern
6.Indian Feather
7.British
8.Indian dot
9.Canadian(wtf? is this a race? a whole race of people I never knew existed!)

Neither of your soda choices. Strawberry soda all the way.

^^^

To follow up his last question....Do you know what juice is?

Kool-aid?

[bamachine]

Ask a black man...

...if she gotta pack much back...

[Gosset the Table]

Why don't black people love beaches?

Have you felt that racism was directed towards you in Texas or anywhere else?

Where did the whole skull cap thing come from?

Do you like Derka's rap tracks?

[neverwenttoUT]

...if she gotta pack much back...

Hey bama, a fan of Sir Mix-A-Lot I see...

Why don't black people love beaches?

Have you felt that racism was directed towards you in Texas or anywhere else?

Where did the whole skull cap thing come from?

Do you like Derka's rap tracks?

1. Because most of us are dark enough as is. We don't need a damn tan. It's hot and we don't like heat.
2. This one white kid called me a $#@!, and I punched him, and I was the only one that got in trouble and it was a black principle. So yea some reverse racism right there. Can't remember any other instance right off hand.
3. Its our spin on Muslim headgear.
4. Haven't given Derka an honest listen yet.

[Ducksmith]

Awesome! Thanks never went!! Oh and one last thing.....you eat the kitty right???

[bigup2dahorns]

who killed biggie smalls and why?

[burntorangebongos]

wow...this thread is kinda like an after school special....so much info on that which is out of our suburban realm!
So, do you eat the kitty?

[bamachine]

Hey bama, a fan of Sir Mix-A-Lot I see...

I am a fan but I think most white people know Baby Got Back from front to, well back. Most do not own Swass though. ;)

FWIW, I have had several friends of the pigmentally rich persuasion over the years. Unfortunately, I have lost touch with them, over the years, except online somewhat. I also have a niece who is married to a black guy I went to school with(he is about 4 years younger than me). They have three kids together(that I spoil every chance I get) and live on our land.

[neverwenttoUT]

who killed biggie smalls and why?

Some dudes that were mad Tupac got killed and were offended Biggie had the nerve to go to Cali like the $#@! was cool.

Awesome! Thanks never went!! Oh and one last thing.....you eat the kitty right???

Of course, gotta be clean though. No smell.

[neverwenttoUT]

wow...this thread is kinda like an after school special....so much info on that which is out of our suburban realm!
So, do you eat the kitty?

Second time I have been asked the question, what am I missing here?

I am a fan but I think most white people know Baby Got Back from front to, well back. Most do not own Swass though. ;)

FWIW, I have had several friends of the pigmentally rich persuasion over the years. Unfortunately, I have lost touch with them, over the years, except online somewhat. I also have a niece who is married to a black guy I went to school with(he is about 4 years younger than me). They have three kids together(that I spoil every chance I get) and live on our land.

Ok, although you are a bama fan you are cool with me, no need for the whole "My best friend is black" "I know black people" etc etc routine........lol j/k

[miguelito]

did you ever go to UT?

[Traffic]

You realize that we're gonna read your posts in a different light now, don't you?

[Ducksmith]

my posse's on broadway but all my dark skin buds are either locked up or in the ground these days....sadly. Thanks for being a good sport Never Went....this is going to be a very amusing thread.

What's up with all these fool gettin' wet and smokin' cigs that have been dipped??

[burntorangebongos]

What is there a new strut these days? I haven't noticed any black men walking with a strut like from "Good Times" in a $#@! ton of years.
If there is a new strut, please provide a link from YouTube.
Also, are those "black poses" that Derka does also already way over, or is that still going on?

[bamachine]

Second time I have been asked the question, what am I missing here?




Ok, although you are a bama fan you are cool with me, no need for the whole "My best friend is black" "I know black people" etc etc routine........lol j/k

Heh, the brothers not eating da coochie is a somewhat funny stereotype.

To set your mind at ease, I have never had a black person as a "best" friend. ;) I have ate at some of their houses and vice-versa. Alas, if they were "best" friends, I probably would have done more to keep in touch.

[Gosset the Table]

What is your favorite TV show on right now?

What's your opinion of Tyler Perry?

What do you think of people who yell at the movie screen?

[neverwenttoUT]

did you ever go to UT?

Nope. In the 9th grade it wasn't cool to be smart and in the 12th grade it wasn't cool to be in class. So my grades wasn't excellent but since I went to an all black school, despite bullshitting for 2 out of 4 years I finished in top 20% instead of top 10% which is basically needed to even have a chance to get into UT.

You realize that we're gonna read your posts in a different light now, don't you?

Wait, umm you guys didn't know I was black already?

[Ducksmith]

No, I'm not interested. I'm just always surprised when a poster turns out to be notaginger. The gingers run this freaking place.

that is some funny $#@!

[Traffic]

Wait, umm you guys didn't know I was black already?

didn't you post on hornfans also? I think you did. I seem to recall your name from a while back.

and, no, I always thought you were an hispanic.

[neverwenttoUT]

my posse's on broadway but all my dark skin buds are either locked up or in the ground these days....sadly. Thanks for being a good sport Never Went....this is going to be a very amusing thread.

What's up with all these fool gettin' wet and smokin' cigs that have been dipped??

You know how we are, well maybe you don't know, $#@! gets old with us fast, gotta try new $#@!.

What is there a new strut these days? I haven't noticed any black men walking with a strut like from "Good Times" in a $#@! ton of years.
If there is a new strut, please provide a link from YouTube.
Also, are those "black poses" that Derka does also already way over, or is that still going on?

No struts, just swag these days. Wiggas always do things black people did after the fact. Anything Derka is doing now was done years ago.

Why you disrespectin' Hoosier, yo?

How are my ebonics?

No, I'm not interested. I'm just always surprised when a poster turns out to be notaginger. The gingers run this freaking place.

No disrepect Hoosier. You my nigga! Your ebonics need work, maybe I could give you a private lesson....

What is your favorite TV show on right now?

What's your opinion of Tyler Perry?

What do you think of people who yell at the movie screen?

I would have to say Boondocks at this current time
Going to suffer through Tyler Perry movies has gotten me lots of pussy, so Tyler is cool in my book.
There are movies where its cool and funny on some lol $#@!, but then there are movies where they need to STFU.

[Jive Turkey]

you should get your own syndicated column.

Ask A Mexican

[burntorangebongos]

Anybody that goes to the Alamo to watch a flick is doing so to be able to yell at the screen like black people, imo.
I totally love yelling at the screen which is why I go to the Alamo for all my theater movie watching. Snakes on a plane was the best Alamo movie watching experience ever to date.
By the way, do black people love Snakes on a Plane as much as white people or mexicans?

[miguelito]

do you speak jive?

[bamachine]

OK, gotta be asked, is this $#@! really comfortable, I can't imagine it is...

[Ducksmith]

Why is it that it seems low self-esteem is a middle to upper class white girl issue?

Let's here a brothers perspective....

Why do you think sista's all think they are the $#@! no matter what they look like and to a certain extent the latinas...

and what about the meth princesses liivin' the white trash cracker lifestyle and workin cut off shirts and bare feet....would you bang one?

[TheRoot]

wait, Derka is really black?

[neverwenttoUT]

didn't you post on hornfans also? I think you did. I seem to recall your name from a while back.

and, no, I always thought you were an hispanic.

lol @ being hispanic. Speaking of hispanics did you all know most of them think its ok for them to say $#@! or nigga. Like we are all brothers. According to them we all have the same struggle as minorities. So that makes it ok to them.

Never posted on hornfans. Funny story when I first discovered hornfans I came across there homepage and wondered why that $#@! never got updated. It took me about two weeks to finally discover there was a messageboard section. Thought the site was worthless before then, well I guess its still worthless to some degree.

you should get your own syndicated column.

Ask A Mexican

I'll pass, only passing this indepth look at being a black man on to my shagster buddies.

Anybody that goes to the Alamo to watch a flick is doing so to be able to yell at the screen like black people, imo.
I totally love yelling at the screen which is why I go to the Alamo for all my theater movie watching. Snakes on a plane was the best Alamo movie watching experience ever to date.
By the way, do black people love Snakes on a Plane as much as white people or mexicans?

Snakes on the Plane is a cult classic for us. Me and my homies were rehearsing random yelling before going see that one.

[Somnio]

When someone says something like, "Fuchsia is the new black", do you get offended?

[USAOROTC]

Why are there less and less black kids playing baseball... Kids who are 5'7-6'0 should be focusing on baseball damnit not basketball!

[burntorangebongos]

No struts, just swag these days. Wiggas always do things black people did after the fact. Anything Derka is doing now was done years ago.
==========
please post a YouTube example to this "swag" that you mention. I just am trying to pinpoint where it is now as compared to the Derka-style-wannabe-stuff.

[EE2B]

Did Michael Jackson have vitiligo or did he really want to be white?

[aaronisnotcool]

i was expecting more paul mooney type answers.

[bigup2dahorns]

what is your favorite food and drink?

[Hank Scorpio]

Do you know who took my TV, and assuming you do, would you ask them to promptly return it. Thanks.

[millhouse]

I like watermelon and fried chicken, but cant stand mayonnaise. Does that make me black?

[neverwenttoUT]

do you speak jive?

When its necessary, some sistas as ignorant as it is like the jive talk.

OK, gotta be asked, is this $#@! really comfortable, I can't imagine it is...
[IMG][/IMG]

Nope and this guy doesn't look black to me. Not to say there isn't some ignorant negroes that where there clothes that way.

Why is it that it seems low self-esteem is a middle to upper class white girl issue?

Let's here a brothers perspective....

Why do you think sista's all think they are the $#@! no matter what they look like and to a certain extent the latinas...

and what about the meth princesses liivin' the white trash cracker lifestyle and workin cut off shirts and bare feet....would you bang one?

1. Its all in there upbringing. The way there parents treat them, everything is always given to them, no real support system etc....Then when they enter the real world and things arn't gifted to them they don't know how to react. There parents aren't really a back bone and is likely high on coke all the tie or having severe marital issues, and they were never taught to have confidence in themselves, which results in low self esteem.

2. Sista's are like the polar opposites. Most of them have a rough upbringing and there parents force them to do something with there lives. Problem most sistas run into is falling in love with the no good nigga. But to directly answer your question they act that way because these dudes stroke there ego so they can open there legs. But they continue to carry on that confidence about themselves as life goes on.

3. Hispanics act that way early on because they know they age badly. So Latina's only have like a 5-10 year window where they can act like they the $#@!, so they take full advantage while they can.

4.Not sure if I would bang one. Would depend on her physical looks, time and place. lol

wait, Derka is really black?

Nope.

[neverwenttoUT]

When someone says something like, "Fuchsia is the new black", do you get offended?

Can't remember right off hand what fuchsia is looks like but ifs it a shade of purple its cool. there are people so black they look purple so its all the same.

Why are there less and less black kids playing baseball... Kids who are 5'7-6'0 should be focusing on baseball damnit not basketball!

No baseball fields in the hood.

Did Michael Jackson have vitiligo or did he really want to be white?

He really wanted to be white. Think Uncle Ruckus, if you watch Boondocks.

i was expecting more paul mooney type answers.

Started to go that direction but I said I would give honest answers.

what is your favorite food and drink?

Italian food is my favorite. Favorite non alcoholic beverage is Raspberry Lemonade. Favorite vodka is Grey Goose. Favorite dark liquor is Hennesy Black. Favorite wine is D'Asti Moscato.

Do you know who took my TV, and assuming you do, would you ask them to promptly return it. Thanks.

I'll check into it. I promise. We'll get your TV back.

I like watermelon and fried chicken, but cant stand mayonnaise. Does that make me black?

Nope liking Mayo is an absolute must.

[neverwenttoUT]

No struts, just swag these days. Wiggas always do things black people did after the fact. Anything Derka is doing now was done years ago.
==========
please post a YouTube example to this "swag" that you mention. I just am trying to pinpoint where it is now as compared to the Derka-style-wannabe-stuff.

[bamachine]

You ever see a brotha OG? That $#@! is sad.

[TxArch]

Why do white people love wayne brady so much?

[OakHill Horn]

This was funny when Paul Mooney did it.